It is good to be fettered
Kris bought me a book a while back that I have been slow getting around to reading. It's a book on called Pastor by William Willimon. This morning I went over the end of the book to read about constancy in ministry ... how to go a long time the right way. And he started to talk about one of the lies or idols of our culture: that maturity involves increasing freedom from ties, social restraint, all external authority. To try and translate what could sound like philosophy, he means we believe that in order to be our true self we must become less and less connected to and dependent on others. These are slippery lines, of course, it is dangerous to be over-dependent on others and that is a real sign of immaturity. BUT, "unfettered freedom is an illusion. There is no person without context and commitment ... none of us is self-made, self-composed."
I am who I am in certain contexts and commitments that cannot be dissolved. In fact, I go along with Wendell Berry and Betsy Fox-Genevese who say that upon dissolving the commitments of family and church we only come under less personal and more damaging fetters (of corporation, marketing, state, etc.)
I am, through Jesus Christ, a member of the body of Christ. I am who I am in context to the body. I am also who I am in context of my family. I am a husband and a father. These commitments define who I am, as well as fill me with a sense of purpose and calling and life. I am also who I am in context of friendship and the commitment that brings. I feel certain that lasting friendship is a gift from God. My great hero Dietrich Bonhoeffer is who he is because of his deep friendship to Eberhart Bethge. The only reason we know as much as we do is because of the profound letters and papers he shared with his friend while in prison.
He talked about friendship as being like a cornflower. Something that is not the fruit of much hard labor (like the corn) but a delicate beauty that is a gift of grace. Yet there is more than that to friendship, because friendship also involves a kind of commitment, a good healthy fetter to safeguard us from the impersonal forces that would enslave us. And as any commitment it requires effort and work from time to time. And it also requires perseverance. I feel I can say this with all surety, though I know that sometimes friendships break. Or perhaps like the darker moments in the scripture, one friend (Jesus called the disciples his friends, including Judas) gives up.
Yet I believe that friendships take on an entirely different source of strength and surety within the church. With voices constantly praying to Our Father; with One Christ, One Spirit, One body, One blood; with the constant reminder (one that came to me this morning in prayer) that Jesus builds the church, that all my work is really God's work, and not mine; with His care and concern over each of His children and His resolve to make us a family (the greatest images of commitment in the ancient world): all these things lead me to solid ground in claiming life-long cornflowers among my brothers in Christ, who have also been my friends for fifteen, fourteen and nine years.
I am who I am in certain contexts and commitments that cannot be dissolved. In fact, I go along with Wendell Berry and Betsy Fox-Genevese who say that upon dissolving the commitments of family and church we only come under less personal and more damaging fetters (of corporation, marketing, state, etc.)
I am, through Jesus Christ, a member of the body of Christ. I am who I am in context to the body. I am also who I am in context of my family. I am a husband and a father. These commitments define who I am, as well as fill me with a sense of purpose and calling and life. I am also who I am in context of friendship and the commitment that brings. I feel certain that lasting friendship is a gift from God. My great hero Dietrich Bonhoeffer is who he is because of his deep friendship to Eberhart Bethge. The only reason we know as much as we do is because of the profound letters and papers he shared with his friend while in prison.
He talked about friendship as being like a cornflower. Something that is not the fruit of much hard labor (like the corn) but a delicate beauty that is a gift of grace. Yet there is more than that to friendship, because friendship also involves a kind of commitment, a good healthy fetter to safeguard us from the impersonal forces that would enslave us. And as any commitment it requires effort and work from time to time. And it also requires perseverance. I feel I can say this with all surety, though I know that sometimes friendships break. Or perhaps like the darker moments in the scripture, one friend (Jesus called the disciples his friends, including Judas) gives up.
Yet I believe that friendships take on an entirely different source of strength and surety within the church. With voices constantly praying to Our Father; with One Christ, One Spirit, One body, One blood; with the constant reminder (one that came to me this morning in prayer) that Jesus builds the church, that all my work is really God's work, and not mine; with His care and concern over each of His children and His resolve to make us a family (the greatest images of commitment in the ancient world): all these things lead me to solid ground in claiming life-long cornflowers among my brothers in Christ, who have also been my friends for fifteen, fourteen and nine years.
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